Mafia: The Mafia - Mafia 83 - Mafia: A Mafia Story

General
1

Rules

  1. Each day phase, every player must vote for whoever they think should be lynched. A vote only counts if you say “vote PLAYERNAME” or “voting PLAYERNAME”. Anything else will be disregarded.
  2. In the even of a tie vote, there will be no extra time. All players tied will be lynched.
  3. You can’t miss two votes in a row. If this happens, you will be removed from the game.
  4. The voting deadlines will be 1100GMT for Day phase and 2200GMT for Night phase, but may be subject to change on a daily basis.
  5. Deleting/editing votes will result in immediate removal from the game.
  6. You are NOT allowed to make public the message sent you by the game moderators to tell you your role, either entirely or in part; should this happen you will be removed from the present game and possibly future editions as well. You can share what your information means, but you cannot share exact text.
  7. No copying text from writers/admins. You may inform someone that you have investigated them and what their role is. Just no copy/pasting.
  8. Once you’re dead, you’re dead. Do not talk about the game to still active players, or post in the forum thread. This will be considered an act of influence upon the remaining players, and will get you banned from future games. There should be no reason that a dead player is having any conversation with living players in regards to the ongoing Mafia game. If it is found out that you are, you will be banned from the next game that you sign up for.
  9. When the game has 4 or less players alive, all players MUST participate in the lynch phase by voting. If a player fails to vote, that player will be the one lynched. You must be willing to make your decision and live/die with it.
  10. BE CAREFUL WITH SCREEN SHOTS! If you post any screenshot that shows any message to\from the moderators, you will immediately be mod killed. There are no exceptions and no “writer’s discretion”. Be warned now, if you post one… you are dead. You should all know better by now.

Mafia

Don Spaghetti
Fat, greasy Italian. Capo of his famiglia in Monowi, Nebraska. Bribed some cops to keep him clean. He’s investigation immune and decides who kills who every night. Immune from night kills. He really likes Spaghetti.
Nicky Tagliatelle
Less fat, more greasy Italian. Don’s right hand. Has a guy. You wouldn’t know. His guy gives him intel. Can investigate someone every odd night. Says “FUGGEDABOUTIT” a lot.
Marco Macaroni
Really greasy Italian. Likes to treat the ladies nicely. Wears suspenders, real classy. Can block someone every even night. Heeyyyyy-yooooo.
Vince Vermicelli
You don’t know this guy, he’s new. Acts stupid all the time. But you trust him. He’s your cousins cousin.
Black Tony
He’s not even black. But when he plays roulette, he always bets on black. He’s funny, you know?

Cops

Paddy O’Malley
Real trustworthy man. Captain of the police. May punch you in the face. He’s investigation immune. Can execute one kill order during the day phase, no more. Once Brian dies, he gets the ability to investigate someone every night. Likes to fish.
Brian McCarthy
A real detective. Often ignores the captains orders to do the right thing. Drinks a lot. He can investigate someone every night.
Jonny O’Shea
Big red hair. Scared of blood. Runs in front of stuff for no reason. He can roleblock someone every night.
Billy Murphy
Gets punched by the captain a lot. Doesn’t really understand stuff. Was a medic in the army. Can heal someone every night. Just not the same twice in a row.

Yakuza Twins

Yuki Suzuki
What? A Japanese guy in Monowi? He must be crazy. He is. Gets to kill someone every odd night. Doesn’t like sushi. Crazy bastard.
Akasuki Suzuki
What? A Japanese guy in Monowi? Oh wait… He gets to kill someone every even night. Likes sushi. Are they really twins?
If one of the twins dies, the other goes into a frenzy and can kill two people every night.

Order of events:
Doctor
Town RB
Mob RB
SK Kill
Mob Kill

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Story
“What is this?” Don Spaghetti exclaimed.
“FUGGEDABOUTIT” he heard, from back in room. He saw Nicky’s greasy face.
“You greasy fuck.” Don Spagghetti yelled at him. “Did you do the thing I asked you to do about the thing we spoke about previously in the thing we don’t mention?”
Nicky looked at him and whiped the grease of his face.
“What do you think?” He said, with a grin on his face. “Don’t you trust me, Don?”
Don Spaghetti smiled. His first name was also Don. Italians are funny like that.
The Pasta Mafia only recently arrived in Monowi, Nebraska. Not much to do, so they needed to build up their business first.
Why am I telling you this? Oh right, back story.
Well, so much for the mobster. Do you really care about this stuff? I doubt it.
More importantly, Ordos stole my strategy in MW. Might just kill him for it.

Paddy O"Malley walked into his policestation. A police station? In Monowi? Whatever…
“Oh, me lucky charms. Did anything happen in town?”
Brian McCarthy was a damn good detective. He had unraveled many a mystery in his days. He looked up a the Captain.
“No, not a damn thing.”
Paddy looked back at him.
“Oh.”

Oh, and some Yakuza guys arrived in the meanwhile. They drove a Honda, I think.

Good luck to all.

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GAME HAS STARTED!

All roles have until 22:00 GMT to send their actions to Blonde and me.

Also Hydro I’ll be expecting those Jessica Alba pics, thx.

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NIGHT 1

You could hear the sound of gunfire from blocks away. An Uzi kept going ratatatatata against a couple of revolvers going pow pow pow!

Yuki Suzuki looked enraged as sprayed bullets all around him, blasting windows and car ties and the odd bird in the sky. From across the street, Don Spaghetti and his goons did their best to avoid the hail of gunfire and returned fire as best they could.

“I say sushi is best. You like sushi!”, the japanese killer howled. “No, I don’t. My name is spaghetti, you crazy gook! Take the hint!”, replied the italian mobster. “Who’d like that crap over pasta and lasagna and meatballs anyway??? You’re out of your damn mind!”

Yuki stopped for a second. “Sushi? Wait a minute. I hate that thing! I was thinking of Sukiyaki.” Yuki giggled like a little girl. “Sorry Don garlic breath, you must excuse my rude manners! I’ll be leaving now!”.

Yuki Suzuki bowed 3 times, got on his bike and sped away. Don Spaghetti slowly got up and looked around: his restaurant’s windows were all shattered! The Don was fuming when a police car sped into the street and stopped just inches away from him.

Brian McCarthy (Swagga) stepped out and inquired: “What’s the cause of all this?”. The Don looked at him, drew his gun and shot him right between the eyes. “Pick him up lads. There’s enough meat on him to make all the meatballs we need to sell to pay for new windows.”

Yuki Suzuki (SK) failed to kill Don Spaghetti
Don Spaghetti (Mafia) killed Brian McCarthy (Cop)

It is now DAY PHASE. You have until 11am GMT to cast your vote in voting channel!

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The morning felt chilly as Don Spaghetti, that fat, greasy and dumb piece of shit, got out of his studio apartment in the town of Monowi, Nebraska. Weird fucking place to be, but OK.
He looked at the KFC across the street and heard his stomach growling.
“No, it’s leg day today. Only dumb fuck juice for me today.” He told himself.
Being a dumb piece of shit, he thought about how positive he had been in life.
It really brought him nothing. He was alone, unhappy and generally miserable.
Luckily, stupidity worked really great for him. He just looked at his phone and scrolled past some facebook feeds. Stuff intelligent people won’t even look at, but they motivated his retarded brain.
Still looking at his phone, he stumbled into the street. Out of nowhere, a bus turned up. Out of nowhere? No, not out of nowhere. That shit head had been looking at his phone all the time, so he just didn’t notice it.
He tried to jump back, but slipped. He fell on his back and as the bus drove by, he could hear the crunching of bones.
He looked down at his legs and saw they were entirely crushed.
“NOOO, not on leg day. Mamma Mia!” He shouted at the top of his lungs.
He stopped screaming and looked at his phone.
“Oh wait, it’s Thursday. It’s not leg day. It’s retardation day.” He died of stupidity.

Don Spaghetti (Cxris) has died. You may all rejoice.
Nicky Tagliatelle is now the new God Father, kiss his ring.

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NIGHT 2

Like every other hick town in the good ol’ US of A, Monowi, Nebraska was feeling the effects of the opiod epidemic.

No one knew this as well as Daylight. The townie had lived in this backwoods desolation his entire life and, with no prospect of a better life, he put on the soiled clothes he wore every day, looked in the mirror which reflected his broad, toothless smile as he put on his red Klan hat, err sorry I meant MAGA hat, and longed for his next fix.

As he stepped out of his RV, Akasuki Suzuki was already waiting for him. “Hey 'suki. Wanna suki-suki?”, Daylight asked as he howled in laughter. “Where is my money?! No more until I get my money!”, the Yakuza man snapped back.

“Aw come on now, fella! I thought we were friends.”, Daylight grinned. Akasuki drew his katana: “No. No friends. Money. Now!” Daylight ran for it but the Yakuza launched his katana at him and severed his left leg below the knee.

As blood gushed out, Akasuki picked up his sword and cut off his other leg and arms and left him there, hat still neatly on his head.

In the Mafia’s restaurant, Don Spaghetti was still being mourned, but business had to go on. As such, meals were still being served.

Ordos had become a regular as he loved to stuff his fat, ugly face with all the pasta and pizza he could get his little greasy hands on. He chowed down meatball after meatball after meatball, but suddenly started feeling sick. All of a sudden he fell down and died. Just like that.

Marco Macaroni approached the townie and slapped him hard a few times, but got no reaction. “Fucking Swagga meatballs. We gotta stop serving that shit.”, he thought to himself.

Akasuki Suzuki (SK) killed Daylight (townie)
Marco Macaroni (Mob) killed Ordos (townie)

It is now DAY PHASE . You have until 11am GMT to cast your vote in voting channel!

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Marco Macaroni had finally adjusted to his life in Monowi, Nebraska.
Life had really turned around for him since he moved to the crummiest of crummy places.
He put on his golden rings and hung his gold chain necklace around his neck.
It had a little gold baby Jesus on the lowest chain, he held it up and kissed it.
From the ground, he picked up a pair of slacks with suspender still stuck to them. He slipped into them and put the suspenders over his shoulder.
He pulled the suspender and let them smack back on on his chest.
“Heeeyyyyy-yooooo!” He yelled at the top of his lungs. “Looking good.”

Feeling great about himself, he walked out the door and saw there was no one there.
Oh right, Monowi was a shit hole. But his shit hole.
Now Cousin Nicky was the new God Father, he knew he’d be the next in line.
He looked around and saw a nice looking woman approaching.
“Hey, baby. You want to grab some Macaroni, eh?” He winked at her.
She looked at him with disgust and scoffed.
Marco raised his arms to the air and tilted his head back.
“You think you’re better than me?!” He yelled at her, with his middle fingers in the air.
He laughed it off.

Marco Maraconi (Jets) died of Gonorrhea (lynched)

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NIGHT 3

It was a quiet night in Monowi, Nebraska. Or it would have been, if not for thirdrock going on and on and on about his mob-hunting accomplishments.

“I told you Jets was mob! He wasn’t being Jetsy enough! Never even accused me! Hah!”. Undeterred, he kept going “Arby is also mob, and so is everyone else i say! There a reason I have Cxris blocked, you know!”.

The townie was having the time of his life, basking in his newfound glory, when he heard someone mumbling behind him, steps coming closer and closer. It sounded japanese, but who’d even speak that language here? Then he realized it wasn’t one voice, but two! And they were arguing with each other, in japanese and italian, and then in very poor english.

“You! Shut up! I Want to sleep!” yelled Yuki Suzuki. “Yea, what he said! Zip it, dumbass!”, added Vince Vermicelli. Thirdrock thought about explaining to them the benefits of his conduct, but thought better of it and made a run for it.

At first it looked like he’d make it, but he tripped over himself and hit his head on the curb and died. Yuki’s katana through the neck delivered the coup de grace to the once heroic leader of the trusted circle.

Yuki and Vince went back to sleep.

Yuki Suzuki (SK) and Vince Vermicelli (mob) both targetted and killed thirdrock (townie)

It is now DAY PHASE . You have until 11am GMT to cast your vote in voting channel!

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“Fuggedaboutit!” Vince Vermicelli heard his new Capo say, so he did.

Ten minutes later he choked to death on a pastrami sandwich.

Vince Vermicelli (Tishxo) was lynched.

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NIGHT 4

Akasuki Suzuki was told from infancy that Yakuza members had no soul. He took that to heart and chopped townie Soul’s head off.

Nicky Tagliatelle had never been married and was fed up with hearing about townie Nolio’s wedding and honeymoon and general happiness. He shot him in the head, wrapped him up in plastic, drove to the woods and buried him in a shallow grave.

It is now DAY PHASE. You have until 11am GMT to cast your vote in voting channe!

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A still rising sun warmed the ground of Monowi, Nebraska. The air was thick and warm as Captain O’Malley walked out of his house located in the outskirts of the town. He put his police hat on and looked down to check his outfit. His uniform looked as pristine as always. He made sure to always be in tiptop shape and his wardrobe needed to reflect the same.
He looked back up and saw a shady looking man approach him.
Seeing as there had been a recent crime wave, he could only assume this would be a hit on his life. He immediately drew his gun, took the safety off and pointed it at the man.
“Stop right there, sonny.” He said, with enough authority to put the man to a halt.
The man stood still and looked at him.
“Sir, I may have…”
Without a single shred of doubt, Captain O’Malley pulled the trigger and shot the man in the neck.
He watched him drop to the ground like a sack of potatoes.
Slowly, he approached him to inspect who it was. A gurgling sound came from his mouth, which was now overflowing with blood. He wore an old Navy uniform, with no lower half. He reminded him of Donald Duck.
On his face, a sincere look of complete surprise and confusion.
It didn’t take long for Captain O’Malley to realize he had made a grave mistake. He pulled up the back of police uniform and pulled a small gun out of the back of his trousers. He put it in the mans hand to make sure his finger prints were on it and threw it a bit away from him.
He got out his phone and called up Billy Murphy, to get him there to get the corpse.
He looked down at the poor man he had just shot as he noticed Billy wasn’t picking up his phone.

Apparently Billy got raped to death by a violent group of gay people.

The_Unknown died of herpes (he was one of the violent group).

The_Unknown (plain townie) was lynched by town.
Billy Murphy (Hala) was lynched by town.
** HydroP** (plain townie) was killed by Captain O’Malley.

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NIGHT 5

Rando had just left his restaurant, having cooked everything on the menu twice! He was tired, but not sleepy yet so he decided to go for a stroll.

He walked along the edge of the forest, smelling the night air, when saw a bike parked in the woods. The townie checked to see if anyone was in need of help, until he checked behind a group of trees and saw Yuki Suzuki smoking an opium blunt.

“Mind if I join you?”, Rando asked. Yuki looked up, nodded and offered the blunt to Rando. It wasn’t until Rando had gotten comfortable that Yuki rubbed his eyes and shrieked in Japanese: “You not Akasuki! Give back!”. Rando cooly replied "Hey man, it’s all good. All yours, I gotta get to bed anyway.

Yuki was having none of it though. He walked to the bike, got his Uzi and drilled poor old Rando’s head full of holes.

Arby had just gotten out of Arby’s having tasted everything they had to offer, but as he was trying to stay fit he planned the spend the next 12 hours jogging.

He tried knocking on friend’s doors to get them to join him, but they were having none of it so he hit the road alone. After 5 hours and 32 minutes of jogging, somewhere along the South Dakota border, he heard a car honking behind him. It was Black Tony.

“Geddouttamywaya!!”, he hollered from his window. You see, Black Tony was very farsighted and had trouble driving in the dark. It was lucky for Arby he spotted him at all, but Tony was afraid to move past him and hit another vehicle coming the other way.

Arby gave him the middle finger and kept his leisurely pace though, so Tony got angry, drew his gun and shot at him, but obviously missed every single shot.

That got Arby running though, but Tony was now incensed and he gave chase. He momentarily forgot about his dim eyesight and tried to overtake Arby so he could get a better shot at him, but of course there was a vehicle coming the other way and they crashed.

Jonny O’Shea stepped out of the vehicle and made a beeline for Black Tony, who had lost his gun. The big Irish and the italian goon got into a slugfest and Arby ran far, far away into the night. That night, he hit a net negative for calories.

It is now DAY PHASE. You have until 11am GMT to cast your vote in voting channe!

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Sometimes life isn’t all you expected it to be. Sometimes life is like a bad dream that you can’t wake up from. For some people it’s to live in a world as warped as the one we live in as they simply don’t look at their surroundings enough and just focus on their selves instead.
“Must be nice…” Schniepel said, while taking a deep hit from a cigarette. The warm air filled his lungs and he felt his throat dry up.
He had tried to tune out all that had been going on in Monowi, Nebraska, but this had gone too far. Mobsters, Italian and Japanese, corrupt cops, villagers going missing. He was going to make a stand.

On a large, old table in front of him he had an entire arsenal spread out. From hand guns to machine guns to even a rocket launcher. A long time ago, he had served as an enforcer for the Linguini family in New York and he was done with it all. He knew this had been a long time coming, as he had been fed up for quite a while now. He had grown weary of it all and there was a feeling of relief now he’d finally chosen to something good for once.
At least if he died now, he’d die a honourable death.

He inhaled and mistakenly inhaled the entire cigarette into his lungs.
He was rushed to the hospital and died of incompetence.

Schniepel (plain townie) has died, lynched by town.

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NIGHT 6

Black Tony (Goddess) had been waiting in vain for his Capo to wake up from his drunken slumber and tell him who to whack, but Nicky Tagliatelle was beyond reach tonight.

Black Tony stepped out of the restaurant and decided to go into business for himself. This whole mob thing wasn’t really working out for him anyway, and he had higher goals than just sitting arou BUMP

“Oooooooooh! What the fuck do you think you’re doing??” Someone had bumped into Black Tony, and had inevitably fallen to the ground. Akasuki Suzuki looked up at the mob goon and wondered what his chances were against the behemot standing over him.

“You answer me when I talk to you, freak! Fkin orientals, go eat your raw fish and get out of my way!”, hollered Tony. Akasuki stood up at once and threw his shurikens at Tony with deadly precision, straight to the back of his head.

“Sushi, not raw fish. Sushi.”

Akasuki Suzuki (SK) killed Black Tony (Goddess) - mob

It is now DAY PHASE. You have until 11am GMT to cast your vote in voting channel!

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Akasuki Suzuki was brought up in the traditional manner.
He liked ninja’s, sushi and watching anime all day long. So much, it hurt him not to watch it.
His twin brother had always been the serious one, much more into real Japanese drama series than him.
“Naze watashitachiha kono misute rareta kuni ni ikanakereba naranakatta nodesu ka?” Akasuki asked his brother, with one of his eyebrows raised up.
“Shitsumon wa shimasen. Tada yaru.” Yuki replied, with a stern look on his face.
Akusuki sighed.
“Shikashi, sore wa sono yōna doraggudesu. Koko ni imasu.”
Yuki walked up to him and punched him in the face.
“Anata wa hajidesu. Anata wa watashitachi no senzo o fumeiyo ni omotte imasu.” Yuki said to him, with a look in his eye that could pierce through armour.

Akusuki jumped up and pulled out his katana midair. Yuki jumped back, barely avoiding the razor sharp tip of the blade.
“NANI?!” Yuki shouted out. “Anata wa sonotame ni kurushimudeshou!”

A fight for the ages commenced, many never before seen moves were displayed in the loft above the deli in Monowi.
Unfortunately we don’t have time to write it out.
Let’s just say he backflipped onto a table and slipped on a piece of sushi. Then he broke his neck?
Or maybe they had some epic last attack and Suzuki died. Who cares?

Akasuki Suzuki (You_Fool) was lynched by town.

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NIGHT 7

Yuki Suzuki was going for blood. Not 1, but 2 Monowites were going to die tonight! Or were they?

As he got on his bike and drove to the victim’s houses, he found that every street he tried to take on the way would either be closed due to repair work being done further ahead or brand new Wrong Way signs that he could have sworn weren’t there the night before.

“Tsuneni kōtsū hyōshiki o sonchō suru”, his father always told him. And so he did, turning back home confused and aggravated.

Somewhere close, behind a big green bush, Jonny O’Shea smiled.

Nicky Tagliatelle was still getting over his hangover and seemed more interested in playing cards and watching porn than trying to win this one.

It is now DAY PHASE . You have until 11am GMT to cast your vote in voting channel!

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Yuki Suzuki, being a serious man by nature, had taken his brothers demise to heart. Even though he may have been slightly responsible for his death, he knew his great uncle Hayabusa would not approve.

He had brought great dishonor to his family next by failing to kill his targets the night before.
There was only one thing left for him to show his great uncle he was still a honorable man, Seppuku.

He looked around the apartment, they lived a pretty sober life, so there wasn’t much to go with.
His weapons he had dropped last night, so he would have to use a household object.

He rummaged through some drawers and found a spork. It would have to do. He dropped to his knees and opened up his blouse. He apparently wore a blouse. With his gut exposed, he firmly took hold of the spork with both hands. One his face was a look of entire determination.

“Pokemon to yugiō no meiyo ni!” He shouted to the heavens.
With a sharp jab he put the spork into his stomach. But it wasn’t very effective. He barely even cut through his skin. He had even brought dishonor to his family in the ritual of Seppuku.
He cried out and tried again, the skin broke a little. He repeated the motion over and over until his blood covered him from the gut down. He had gotten a poorly cut opening, but an opening nonetheless.
He jammed the fork in and tried to spoon out his entrails. With a lot of hard work, he had finally managed to get out a part of his small intestines. He pulled them and used the spork to get out more.
It hurt like hell, but he wasn’t going to give up.
“Motto, motto!” He yelled as he kept pulling.
He felt the intestines ripping in his hand and the smell of his own feces filled his nose.

Exhausted, he fell head first into a pool of feces, blood and entrails.

What he didn’t know, is that it takes a long fucking time to bleed to death like this.
He died about 2 days later of sepsis.

Yuki Suzuki (Sunstorm) was lynched by town.

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NIGHT 8

Quiet nights 'n quiet stars, quiet chords from my guitar
Floating on the silence that surrounds us
Quiet thoughts 'n quiet dreams, quiet walks by quiet streams
Climbing hills where lovers go to watch the world below together

We will live eternally in this mood of reverie away
from all the earthly cares around us
My world was dull each minute until I found you in it
And all at once the happiness I knew,
Became these quiet nights of loving you!

We will live eternally in this mood of reverie away
from all the earthly cares around us
My world was dull each minute until I found you in it
And all at once the happiness I knew,
Became these quiet nights of loving you!

Hmmm

It is now DAY PHASE . You have until 11am GMT to cast your vote in voting channel!

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Nicky Tagliatella hit his head on a… truck?

Nicky Tagliatella (Spanky) was lynched to death by town.

Town won. Poorly. Huzzah!

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